this is an attempt to explain.
yesterday i was ME…i LOVED it…i performed music for a few hours.
i LOVE that…
it meant so so much to me, and to my family and friends…
it is my gift – my talent.
i can think musically…
and i am so glad i have been trusted with that gift.
Today is a RECOVERY DAY.
yes i still have my talent…BUT it is now pay-off for having that day of feeling “human”.
Yes i am still me…the crock…the chiarian.
obviously i did all the sensible things like
- using my cane
- sleep each day
- sat during all my music
- barely stood up
- no carrying
- took GOOD pain cocktail
- took NO CHANCES!
so once again….I should NOT forget this is the trade-off.
TODAY i hurt :
- back of head
- ALL of head
- pain killers during night and hours before getting up
- back of neck
- legs weak
- arms unusually weak
- eyes tired
- need more sleep – even than my “normal” nap
- HAIR combing is painful
- thinking is slow
- face that pale shade of GREY.
- blinking hurts
- head too heavy
- pain relief is NOT often enough
- every cell in my body is on low power
- need to lie down
THAT is a Chiari Malformation – a Chiari Malformation and what it does to a life.