a blue christmas


sadness and awareness of effects on my mood on the Christmas day didn’t help….
depression is never planned but always painful and unkind……..

at least i have a brain

I didn’t plan a blue Christmas.

i planned a day with the knowledge that yes, i was sick…but there are worse.

i was just out of hospital …but i was at home…that was all that mattered.

mammy had died this year,:

  • but god help young people battling hideous inhuman diseases….
  • mammy in my “planning mind” was saved so much of the worst ravages of Alzheimer
  • the disease she had been given was ultimately not the one which she chose to die by
  • I was so glad for mammy

i was glad for daddy.  Who had not possibly any regrets having caring for mammy lovingly and selflessly for all the years she was unwell. Daddy had prayed for the health and ability to do that, and he had been blessed his wishes. He had prayed that mammy never lost the gentle dignity she had, and she didn’t …never. She managed a…

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