blah, blah, blah……


i was NOT good at english at school

RELATIVELY not good.

i was good at analytical essays,

comparisons,

synopsis…

but CREATIVE writing?

NOPE.

not me

POETRY?

NOPE.

definitely not me.

i was a quiet, odd child

nowadays i may be labelled as having aspergers

in those days i used to seek solace in practicing piano…

particularly hours of harmonic minor scales…

but that inner nerd took me through a lot of my life!

NOW?

now am older

bruised and tarnished and scarred by life.

but wiser .

and NOW

i KNOW where my voice is.

i USE it.

so why do i BLOG?

do i blog about you?

NO.

i write about me.

my pain

my life

its limitations

it’s adjustments – the painful ones.

my loneliness.

in fact what do i blog?

or WHY do i feel I am important enough to write a BLOG?

am quite sure they have all been asked by many people including me!

do i see myself on the LateLate Show when my little pages become a bookdeal?

do i hELL!!

but sometimes in a moment of deep humour i’d LOVE to see a few faces if i were known to be going to write my memoirs….

my blog is nothing like that

and I am nothing like that.

so first you need understand a BLOG- what is it?

blog

there you go.

big deal.

But why me?

what do i feel i have to gain by blogging?

my MENTAL Health!

my physical health has feck all that i can do about it,

In a nutshell.

i write therefore i think therefore i process therefore in a way i VOICE what is hurting me, confusing me.

i no longer bottle up PAIN.

that was a younger me.

The survivor me has a voice.

past

it is cathartic for me

it doesn’t change the world or what the world has given me to deal with, but it feels like I am telling someone MY feelings.

if i was American maybe i wouldnt need to blog…I’d pop in, lie down and tell my shrink…WOW i’d love the luxury.

blog5

(BLACK HUMOUR!)

so what do i blog about?

what is happening.

my health, my life, my feelings, my thoughts

but i never lie – that would defeat the purpose!

truth in my hands

i don’t aim to DEFEAT or SHAME others,

i would never do that…

no emails to the papers

no bitching to the town gossips

not my style

i would challenge and speak to people

but my lifestyle is

i tend to stay at home -and write concept of how i am.

blog3

yes

in a way it’s ALL ABOUT ME.

but that’s why i bother.

it is to help me.

to remove it from my thoughts and purge it to paper.

Do i worry what people think of it?

NO…am not under any illusion that i am a writer

it’s just me!

blog4

mine is not a style so much as a think it and type as you do.

its honest thought

raw pain

crap health

good days

GOD…

experience

and often how i feel about large bodies like health and education where my inner leftie rises to speak to inform people what i have learned by experience…

maybe at some stage i will feel i don’t need to rant.

but at the minute

i do…

blah, blah, blah…

blog1

hx

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