i do feel overwhelmed.
i am not a juggler
i am an ejit who tried to do things she knows or should know are beyond her.
i still fail to use and mean the word “no”. as in my head i am still the musician i always was…but i forget i am now a musician beginning all over again, with a group who don’t know what is involved.
GREAT in theory i have done my nest..but my best should be better.
i STILL have the brain i use dot have , sure that is all i need.
except it isn’t!
today my best seems to be just about holding up others’ lack of commitment with my limited strength.
i doesn’t feel like my best IS enough!
not my energy level,
not my physical ability
nor my stamina.
my best shouldn’t be a BEST .
sure even THAT has been disabled
i am overwhelmed and deflated in what my BEST is…
so i smile and try to pull them all along with me…