Dear doctor,

dear doctor,

a blog as if i were going to WRITE a LETTER and i have no intention of BOTHERING filling in the rest of that letter, as in my experience, words on paper often have an associated panic reaction. WHY  does every written word seem to be assessed in a “formal” way. If i wanted to complain i’d call it a complaint….

this is little.

it’s ME . ME -probably being vulnerable and as a result of having an invisible condition and therefore about 10 years of trying to be believed, when I described symptoms. That’s normal for us CHIARI patients. Abstract and unrelated numbess and pains…and you get used to the fact that nobody seems to be believing you. But that passed with the validation of the diagnoses. Thank GOD. eventually you can stop banging your “headache” on the wall when you have a REASON.

that’s why these letters HURT me.

It’s nothing in it that is rude, offensive, judgemental.

It is just the way you phrase your letters about me.

I have learned that since I juggle all the eggs, since I am the one who holds umbrella care on me. the expert on this condition, that i need to keep copy of all the doctors letters….. as some are lacking in important details, some make references I can look up. Some purely recount all that was said at an overwhelming appointment.

But this particular one HURTS me.

when i read phrases like:

  • the lady says…
  • this lady seems
  • the lady reports that
  • …she complains of…
  • she does not appear to…
  • she insists that…
  • she reports that she is not feeling very well at all.
  • she was annoyed about..
  • she has apparently …
  • …which I had apparently suggested”…

WHY does each one of those HURT me and make me feel like he DOUBTS ME….here we go again.

STILL gut punches me.

And i have to say that he is one of the friendly doctors while you are with him…. but he has experience which has caused him to refer to people by almost implying he doesn’t believe them. I AM GOING to chat him. This is NOT a nice way to treat people. ..especially people who have had years of PROVING THEMSELVES already.

PLEASE choose your words Doctors – your detached and legalistic way of representing me, when you are summarising and circulating to others in my care package, your WORDS reporting can WOUND! When you are phrasing words in a ass covering way, I am hurt with each line!


Even now that i have a condition which explains all the symptoms i have, a LABEL, it’s a CHIARI MALFORMATION.

i have ENOUGH PAIN without your use of language causing more!

i am JUSTIFIED in having these symptoms and MORECP09BZjWUAAp7x1


INVISIBLE DISEASES understandinginvisibleillness



  1. Exactly the same thing I have been going thru for years. I finally gave up and just keep going to my family doctor. She is the only one who listens, cares and treats me with dignity. What else is there to do?
    Most times I find the nurses are so much more compassionate than most of the doctors I have been to. Maybe I have built up thick skin toward doctors by now, but now I also know how the elderly people I used to take care of as a nurse felt, being in constant pain all the time.
    This has opened my eyes and my heart to a lot of people in pain. I guess I never really understood. I guess no one really understands until you go thru it yourself, especially when it never goes away.

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