today i cried
i cried openly
i cried for hours
that i didn’t know i had in me.
i definitely had no plan to flood the room
but so many painful thoughts
perceptions of judgements
then on me
means no guard to defense system
so after stress building
but building too long and too cruelly
tears flooding everywhere
rivers and rivers of tears
tissues covered my knees
as the words and the tears tumbled freely out
honest tears from the heart of my pain
HOURS of tears
uncontrollable as they had needed to escape
held back behind pretense not of coping,
but of simply going through motions
when the “motions” and the “processes” were wounding me ruthlessly- RELENTLESSLY with not a hint of any remorse.
the only way to speak my truth was in tears
i needed that cry.
i had no choice
i was broken
the tears explained the words i missed
the tears spoke
my heart’s words.